An Open Letter to Alkaline Trio

Dear Matt, Dear Dan, Dear Derek,

I love you guys. I love you more than the stars in the sky: I love you more than dew drops on grass in early summer mornings: I love you more than the smell of fresh bread: I love you more than words. I want to have a family of tiny guitars, basses and drums with you. This is the most intense and one of the longest relationships I’ve ever been in.

You are with me every day – to keep my colleagues out, to make my commute bearable, to pick me up, to keep my pace and make me run faster, to scream down the walls of my apartment. Even grooveshark.com has figured out how much I love you as when I set it to play all my music on shuffle, it plays more Alkaline Trio than anything else. And then you just fuck me like this, like it means nothing. Of course, it’s up to me to end this, to walk away from what is clearly a situation which we won’t be able to resolve or overcome. I’m the one who needs to stop living in the past and realize we can never go back to what once was. But it’s so difficult. After all, it’s about 11 years now that you’ve been a part of my life, and I’m still not sick of you.

I know, it was my fault (or rather V.S.’s) I didn’t keep the one opportunity we’ve had for that one perfect date, and I still regret this more than a lot of other things I’ve done (and we know how many incredibly stupid things I’ve done over the years). But since then it has just been getting worse and worse and I can't take more of your disappointing behavior. You’re not only letting me and our relationship down, but you’re letting yourselves down too. The ache in my heart is indescribable. I’d rather put my head through a window, stamp on my iPod (which I love more than any person in this world, and possibly more than some of my shoes too, so that’s saying a lot), stub out cigarettes on my arms, than take one more second of this travesty our relationship has turned in to.

First it was Agony and Irony, then the even more horrible This Addiction, but I still stayed with you like the faithful oh so in love girlfriend I have been. But seriously, what the fuck! Why are you destroying some of the most amazing moments of our relationship with the complete and utter crap that is Damnesia? 

As I'm typing this, I'm listening to We've got so far to go (the original):

Soon ends our stay here and it's been fun.
So tonight I'll raise my glass to us.
'Cause we've talked so much I think we filled this ashtray twice,
And I'm pretty sure we emptied every bottle in the place...

How many times haven't we done just that? I really thought it would last forever, but our relationship will have to end here. To be prefectly frank: YOU GUYS SUCK ASS!

With a broken heart

Anna