Monday, August 22, 2011

184 days without shoes

It's official. Even I have now come to the conclusion that I have a ridiculous amount of shoes. A fucking tower I stumble over as I try to get in or out my front door - I would guess about 15 pairs, the shoes I'm currently high on are stranded pretty much exactly where I left them when I took them off. On the shoe rack, shoes are stacked on each other, three pairs high in some place, and to be honest, I don't even remember what shoes I have there (I do know there are pairs I haven't even worn yet, but don't ask me what they look like). But that doesn't really matter since I can't get to the shoe rack anyway, because to get to it I'd have to first climb over the shoe tower and then climb over the 11 boxes containing, yes you've got it, shoes.

I recently discover that the following ins't actually true:



I discover this after having bought six pairs in, um, 4-5 weeks. Turns out everything was exactly as it was before I got the shoes and it made no impact on anything apart from my credit card. (Which incidentally got even more abused as I also had to buy new outfits to go with the damn shoes.) And that actually made things worse. Here I am, a bunch of shoes, a massive credit card bill, and the same shit hanging around my neck. (That's a metaphor - just explaining in case you're simple.)

So, I will be shoeless for 184 days. No, that doesn't mean I'll be walking around barefoot, it just means that no new shoes to be purchased for 184 days. A shoe buying embargo. (Though the jury (which will, er, probably be me) hasn't decided yet if someone else can buy the shoes and then I'll give them money...) It has almost been one month already (not counting the little kinda, sorta exchange that may have meant I had to give money to get the shoes - that's not what is entailed in buying, is it?) and I'm beginning to feel this is a really good thing - maybe there will even come a day when I'm not known at work as "the girl with the shoes".

But somehow I'm pretty sure I will come up with a "logical" reason for why I need to buy new shoes before the 184 are over.



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